Friday, April 11, 2008

“Give Me Love Dada!” – Busy Season Blues
As most of you know, I am a CPA and am in that time of year that my colleagues and I call “Busy Season”. Busy Season lasts from approximately the second week in January through the end of March and usually drags a bit into April. No I do not do taxes other than a bit of corporate tax, but I do audit mid to large companies, think of it as my team providing a good housekeeping seal of approval for these companies’ financial statements. Busy season keeps me at work late into the night from midnight to even as late as 3 am nightly during some the busiest weeks.
Needless to say I have missed some good times with the family and Jennifer has been carrying the load with Jake considering that he was born during this rough time. Busy season is not only rough on me, but also on Jennifer as well. Many times when coming home late at night around 1 am, I see Jennifer up feeding Jake. It is hard on both of us and I am sorry I am not able to help much. I try to help out as much as I can on the weekends but lately those too have been work intensive. In fact the lowest moment during it all was this past Sunday.

For months Jennifer and I planned to take Henry to “A Day Out with Thomas” in Grapevine, Texas. A real steam engine that looked just like Thomas the Train was the star attraction of this festival. As most of you probably know, Thomas is the toy steam engine and currently the object of Henry’s obsession. Henry has about 20 of these little wood trains and has a set of train tracks to play with. Henry loves Thomas and his friends (all trains have their own names and Henry has memorized every single train in the catalogue) and takes at least one train every where whether on a short car ride, a visit to the mall or hanging out at a restaurant, he has a train in his hand. Thomas is such a part of our family that we have even adopted the vernacular of the show in our everyday language. We often say, “Henry is a useful engine!” whenever Henry displays the shows main traits of being useful, courteous and friendly to your neighbor. So heading to this live version on a real steam engine (from Grapevine to the Fort Worth Stock Yards and back) was going the ultimate play day for Henry, and he could barely contain his excitement Sunday morning. His Cousin Taylor was going and so was his buddy Max but not his dad. I unfortunately had a Monday deadline and worked until 3AM on a Sunday night and missed the entire event. I was happy that everyone had a great time, but missed out once again on my boy’s very special day. Further, I have not been able to help with Jake’s scheduled feedings or have significant bonding time with him. Worse, missed a few family and friend events and even had Henry crying in my arms one rare night at home saying “Dada no work, Dada no work, stay home”.

As bad as the situation is, I do have my saving graces and try to get a little work/life balance in the middle of this…many nights I make it home for dinner around 6pm. I stay to put Henry to bed and play with Jake and head back to the office around 8pm. Other days, I invite Jennifer to lunch with the audit team (they love our boys!) and do whatever I can to spend as much time as possible with the family like going into work on Saturday after lunch or Sunday after church and lunch. As bad as it is at times, I know the following truths and they say the truth sets you free”
· My schedule is extremely flexible – and once Busy Season is over, I honestly can take my 6 weeks of vacation. Further as a Senior Manager – I can break away from time to time to go to the doctor appointments or just show up a little later than most during work hours. I am judged by my finished product not how I get there.

· This thing called Busy Season is temporary and thankfully, just about over.
· I have the full support of my beautiful wife.
· My boys still love me.

How do I know this, let me tell you a story from this evening. I walked in from work today at 7pm (just missed dinner again) and Henry yells “DADDA IS HOME”. I come in and say hi to everyone and he stretches out his loving arms and says in his perfect little way (he has become quite the speaker these days)….GIVE ME LOVE DADDA! He then squeezes me as hard as he can and pats my back (as he says…“I squuuuuuueeeeeeeeeeeze it”). It was the best bear hug a dad can have. No questions, no judgments, just pure unconditional love.

Jake also showing the love…He smiles at me on demand. All I have to do is just touch his cheeks just to the left of his lips and prod him and he just smiles away. All stress just drains from your system with his cute little smile.

Jennifer, well, what can I say, she is the best. She cares for Jake, carts Henry around and still has time for herself and her friends. She is doing great and never once complained about my schedule. We have had a couple tiffs, but when two adults are not sleeping and are not seeing much of each other, you will have those moments. But we manage. I would like to go on record and say that Jennifer is the most patient, kind and just plain perfect wife. She is the best mother and some one whom I truly admire. I really appreciate her support.

So I have turned the corner on my peak time, still have a few days left but overall, I am working to about 7pm and headed home. Things are slowly normalizing…Jennifer wants to start a new home project and she is filling up our weekend schedule for family and friend events that I can attend without problem. I am happy it is over and I am happy to have a family that during the middle of it will just say hi when I get home and say, “Give me love Dada”. All else if forgiven and forgotten and for that I give them that love right back.

On another note, as I said earlier, Jake is really smiling now. He also likes to grab onto things and especially loves the dangling toys on his bouncy seat. We can tell that he is really becoming cognizant of his surroundings. I have had the past two midnight feeding shifts and am really seeing him grow and am finally forming that all important dad/son bond with him. He is a lot of fun. By the way, he is now up to 10lbs 13 oz at 2 months old and it looks like many of his medical problems are slowly working themselves out. We are very appreciative of all the thoughts and prayers everyone has given Jake. They really have helped.

We just hope he passes through his latest issue of constipation quickly!
Speaking of constipation, we have a funny story. As I just mentioned, Jake has only gone #2 a few times over the past week and really is uncomfortable since he cannot poop. He have now changed his formula, put him on Milk of Magnesia and in dire straits, bought some suppositories…you know the liquid gel that you squeeze through a tube and stick up his rear to help him go. Well we had to go to that last resort last week as there was a four day period between poops. I came home and administered the apparatus in his rectum and we made a family event to watch what happens next. To set the scene, we are in our kitchen, we but a soft blanket on the countertop and cover it with newspaper. We take off Jake’s clothes and lay him on the newspaper. Henry is on a stool watching right next to Jake, Jen to my left and I administer the action. Nothing happened for 5 minutes and then all of the sudden #2 comes shooting out and lands squarely on Henry’s shirt! Jen and I laughed so hard but Henry was pretty upset being pooped on! Jake then unclogged himself and probably filled up 5 diapers worth of yellow-gold relief! He has been getting better, but I cannot wait to tell some future girlfriend of Henry’s how his little brother dookied on him!

As for Hank, he is talking us crazy. He is singing full songs, he misses a few of the lyrics, but it only makes it cuter. His favorite song is “Goodnight Sweethart” and serenaded Jake tonite with it. His vocabulary is increasing exponentially daily and says the most random things with really great diction….some of our favorites:

When playing his CDs in the car, one of the songs is “This little light of mine” and has a gospel rendition of “Amen” at the end of it. When the song was over, he says, “I like that song momma” so matter of factly and proudly.

The other day, when I was heading to work, he grew overly concerned that I was forgetting my work I brought home so came running up to me as I was leaving and said, “Dada don’t forget your backpack” and kept repeating it until I picked it up. He is such as Useful Engine.
Before any meal, he MAKES us say grace. As good Catholics we say the traditional meal blessing that our grandmothers taught us, with full sign of the cross action. Henry usually doesn’t say the prayer…too long and complicated and can only do half of the sign of the cross. Well Henry is in Mother’s Day Out school twice a week at Lake Highlands Baptist Church and apparently learned a new grace before meal. Tonight, Jennifer started the traditional blessing and Henry interrupted and said, “I have a new one Momma”, He then puts his hand on his forehead and says “Father”, then moves his hand to his heart and says “Son” and then touches both shoulders and says “Holy Spirit AMEN” – ah his first perfectly executed sign of the cross! What a moment…he then says “God is good, let us thank us for our food AAAAAAAAAAMEN!” and claps his hands at the end. Lake Highlands taught him well. Perfect blend of Catholic and Protestant, nice and concise and makes everyone happy!

Other randoms…just in a typical car ride one day just blurts out “I like kangaroos”. What is going on in his head? I don’t know but whatever it is, he is just thinking and imagining away.

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